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Greensboro, North Carolina ? A mother is told not to openly breastfeed her child during a TriadMommies.com event.
On Monday, September 6, 2010, the mother of a three month old arrived at a Greensboro coffee shop for a TriadMommies.com event, only to be told by one of the owners that if she chose to breastfeed, she needed to be covered with a towel. The mother, who was not nursing at the time, discussed the situation with the owner, then left the shop voluntarily. This controversial conversation was reported locally by WGHP, and the story ran on national media outlets, including cnn.com, latimes.com and orlandosentinal.com. The owners of the coffee shop have since apologized for the incident.
The Mommies Network (TMN) fully supports a mother?s right to choose the best method for feeding her child, whether the mother chooses open or covered breastfeeding, bottle-feeding or a combination of methods. We are pleased to see that the coffee shop has implemented changes as a result of this situation to make their establishment a friendly place for breastfeeding mothers.
TMN is a 501c(3) non-profit organization founded in April 2005, and we have over 100 communities in 32 states and over 25,000 active members. Part of TMN?s mission is to help all moms find support and friendship in their local community. We welcome all mothers, regardless of their background, station in life, viewpoints or status. All mothers need local support, and TMN provides a way for mothers to connect for friendship, support and fun.
On one side is a Mommy who valiantly and bravely faces tantrums, hunger strikes and outright defiance in her efforts to get one little boy to eat healthy food.
On the other side is a stubborn four-year-old with a taste for over-processed chicken nuggets and powder cheese snacks and pastas.
Constantly gathering intel, I've come across several articles with tips to help your child eat healthier. The problem is, I'm doing everything on those lists!
Tip #1: Grow a garden. The theory behind this is that when your child recognizes, grows, sees healthy food, they'll be more likely to eat healthy food.
Yeah. Right. So why is it a battle to get my child to eat tomatoes, zucchini, paddy pans, green beans, spinach, lettuce and any number of things we grow? The only things he'll eat are peas and carrots and only straight from the garden. If I bring them inside and put them on a plate they suddenly become "disgusting".
Tip #2: Take a trip to the farm where your child can see how food is grown.
Yep. Been there, done that. And it's why Joseph no longer eats eggs. He thinks that there are baby chicks inside each egg.
Tip #3: Teach them to cook. As you all know, Joseph is my little sous chef. In theory, this would mean that he'd help me eat all the lovely stir frys and pastas that we create. In reality, he loves to cook and then spends all his time picking everything remotely green off his plate.
Tip #4: Encourage them to eat their veggies. Oh. Is that what's it called? Encouragement? I've done everything from singing "Party in my Tummy" to ignoring his avoidance to telling horror stories to explaining how big and strong he'll grow from eating his veggies. At one point, my lovely son looked at me and said, "Then I want to be little."
Tip #5: Be a role model. Chad and I eat our veggies. Every time. We even talk about how delicious they are. But he's on to us.
Tip #6: Teach them to read labels. Well, he can't read, but I have managed to instill a fear of HFCS. Maybe that's a baby step?
Tip #7: Let them help you shop. Is this woman a mother? Does she not realize that taking two children shopping with you should be deemed illegal under anti-torture regulations? Has she ever walked an entire store with a little boy saying, "Can I have...." even when we're walking past charcoal briquettes? Has she ever had a baby in the cart tossing all the contents of her purse onto the ground? Has she ever tried to read nutritional information, attach a coupon and compare prices while the man behind the butcher's counter ask if her son's been tested for ADHD?
For the record, I have taken my children shopping. And Joseph still doesn't eat his veggies.
I'll keep searching. And trying. And one day, as God is my witness, I'll prevail.
*Cue Gone with the Wind orchestration*
Mandy Dawson is a wife and mother of two living on the beautiful Central Coast of California. While she's not scanning the internet for the Rosetta Stone of Children's Eating Habits, she can be found blogging at http://inmandyland.blogspot.com.
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We don?t have cable.In fact, no one in our family in this state has cable.And on those occasions when we do watch The Tube, it?s always some sort of sitcom or maybe a forensic-anthropologist-and-FBI-agent-crime fighting drama.But not so long ago, while staying in a hotel, I got sucked into one of those daytime Real Housewives marathons.Oh boy.
First of all, who in the world came up with the name of this show?From what I saw, not a single woman was ?real.?One woman was having plastic surgery as part of the show.There were weaves being pulled by acrylicedfingernails.Hair dyed.Hair bleached.Ridiculously drawn on eyebrows.The number of faux tans made me wonder if the tv needed the color adjusted because everyone looked like an Oompa Loompa castoff.No, real is not the first thought to come to mind.
Then there?s the ?Housewives? part of the title.They have maids and nannies to care for their households, and some aren?t even married.It seems to me that part of the definition of being a wife is to be married to someone? anyone.From my short, highly edited glimpse into these lives I gather that they shop a lot, spend an inordinate amount of time grooming or being groomed, and drink wine while gossiping about each other and planning parties.
I get it.Sensation sells.You can?t have a storyline without conflict and resolution.As far as entertainment goes, reality shows are among the lowest forms.But as a true housewife, a homemaker if you please, I take offense at the title and the ludicrous portrayal.SAHM, WAHM, MOTC? we should all be offended.
So why isn?t there a Real Housewives of the Piedmont Triad?I?ll tell you.
My day began around 4:30 this morning when the 00toddler climbed into bed with us.The next 3 hours were spent in a battle to maintain my place in our king sized bed with enough blanket to keep away hypothermia, all while nudging two snoring males and removing random limbs from my face.Then it was time for the noisy neighbor kids from down the block to rustle me from the bedroom with their unbelievable decibel levels.
Then my schedule followed a typical Thursday plan: work on homemade gift for some upcoming birthday/fundraiser/holiday; make breakfast; clean up said breakfast while assisting with the Thomas the Train puzzle; check emails, facebook, and TMN forums to make sure I am still alive; coloring with 00toddler, reading with 00toddler, making lunch for 00toddler, missing a play date with 00friend because 00hubs has the car today; baking a cake for a friend; baking breakfast bars; wrestling 00toddler for a nap; snack time for 00toddler; fit in a shower somewhere; plan and prepare dinner for the family; scrub a toilet or dust a shelf; more puzzles; more books; answer ?What happened to triceratops?? for the millionth time only to be told ?No, triceratops go to Costco.?Then there?s a family bike ride or walk, swinging and maybe a game.More books, more puzzles, probably and elephant parade through the house.Then it?s bedtime with prayers, one more book, and some snuggles.On a good day I might balance the checkbook, too.
Not once did I call a friend to discuss the financial struggles of another.I did not look up police records of anyone.I did not consult a psychic, medium, or spiritual guru.I didn?t get my teeth whitened or involve 00teenager in my conflicts with others.Are there people around here that I don?t like?Probably.Am I going to waste my time acting like a teenager because of that for other people?s entertainment?Um, no.
So the short answer to the question is simple.For the real housewives out there, our lives are just too boring for television.And for that, I am eternally grateful.
Ashley is the lucky mommy of the 00family and part of the TriadMommies community. She lacks the time management skills and cooperative two-year-old to properly maintain a regular blog, but you can see what she's crafting at craftalong.blogspot.com.
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One in four women do not feel adequately informed by their gynecologist, and almost half don?t take part in prenatal classes*. These women don?t realize the risk of being unaware about medical consumerism and what impact that can make on their pregnancy, labor and delivery. In a day where elective procedures such as unnecessary ultrasound and scheduling inductions and cesarean sections for patients? or doctors? schedule confl icts, it?s no wonder the CDC reports our Caesarean section rate currently at 31.8% in the United States**.
Doctors are educated and trained to know how birth works and we value them to handle emergencies. Yet with a healthy pregnancy, labor and delivery, their input should only be to complement us, not do it for us.
Women today are doing it all. We run companies, we own companies, we work construction, we run for President. We buy stocks, we sell stocks, we buy houses, we sell houses. We have proven ourselves capable of all this, yet we have taken a step back in our own health management - and that of our baby?s. We put so much time and effort into researching options and gas mileage when we are in the market for a new car but we don?t make educated decisions about our births.
We are made to birth our babies. Women are strong and can make healthy choices to give their babies the best start to their lives. Get informed. Be proactive. Your future generation depends on it.
Jeanette Albright lives in La Salle with her husband Aaron and three naturally birthed children. She is a SAHM, a ?retired? structural engineer, an affiliated natural childbirth teacher of The Bradley Method and the writer of Childbirth & Beyond?Naturally for BlogsMonroe. For more of Jeanette?s writing or contact information, visit www.blogsmonroe.com/childbirth. Jeanette is also the Site Administer for ToledoAreaMommies.
*Plataforma SINC
** National Vital Statistics Reports Volume 57, Number 12
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A Dad's Point of View: There Are No Perfect Friends I remember that one of my mother?s many sayings, when I was growing up, related to friends and went something like, ?If you want perfect friends, you won?t have any.? This was often in response to my irritation at what a particular friend had done. Later, more often than not, if my mom asked me if that particular thing my friend had done was resolved, I?d have forgotten what it was altogether. As with so many things our parents say to us, their advice often goes unheeded but comes back later in life to haunt us because of their truth. We could have saved ourselves much pain and embarrassment had we paid heed originally. My mom is probably laughing, somewhere high above, since her death two years ago, at the ?fun? I?m living with thanks to my two teenagers. As she may have said, ?What goes around comes around.?
My older teen basically has perfected the art of seemingly paying attention to me while singing in his head his latest favorite song. My younger one has just learned that talking back is the expected thing to do upon entering your teens, now that he?s a firm 13½. He not only talks back but also questions just about everything I ask of him.
If I could speak to her today, I would say, ?Mom, I?m sorry for all those times I talked back and all those times I disregarded your wisdom that had come from your considerable life experiences. Is there any way I can turn back the clock and make it all up to you so my kids don?t have to learn the same, hard way that I did?? And to my dad, I?d say, ?Dad, why didn?t you tell me more forcibly that Mom was always right? Why did you just have that funny ?you?ll see? smile and keep your mouth shut while always saying, ?yes dear??? But enough of the self-recrimination and feeling sorry for myself. It?s just one of those ironies of life that my boys are repeating in so many ways the same mistakes my mother so diligently tried to protect me from, especially in regards to friends. My mother had so many friends and I just didn?t learn nearly enough from watching her interactions with them. She rarely talked about herself, but instead always seemed more interested in what her friends had to say or complain about. If a friend was in any sort of need, she was there. Her patience with those friends who didn?t reciprocate was monumental in my view, as a child growing up. But, she kept most of her friends for a lifetime.
I didn?t follow her example and sadly, I?ve lost some good friends along the way when I allowed hurt feelings or a long forgotten irritation of some sort to de-rail the friendship. Fortunately, I finally did learn what my mother so wisely explained, that there are no perfect friends. We?re all fallible human beings and to have much in the way of expectations of those we care about is sometimes just setting the stage for disappointment.
Another wise cliché is that we don?t choose our relatives, but we do choose our friends. Therefore, their loyalty is undoubtedly sincere if these friendships have been worked on and maintained over time. Yes, life circumstances may change, but memories and comfort with each other may not. I?ve found that in some cases, the changes in our lives were too much for the friendship to survive while in the case of my best friend since 10th grade, those changes didn?t seem to matter.
For my best friend and me, our lives went in significantly different directions after college in almost every area one can think of. He got married young at 23; I stayed single until I was 39. He had three children before I even married. He chose a conventional career; I chose showbiz. He moved to the suburbs; I stayed in the city. He celebrated his 25th wedding anniversary while I celebrated my 50th birthday with divorce papers. He recently moved out-of-state; I?ve stayed put. The examples abound between us. But, the connection we made in high school and college was true and deep. We used to think of ourselves as ?Frick and Frack.? I was the crazy one; he was the levelheaded one. Those differences worked for us as I encouraged risk-taking in him, while he got me to back away from bungee jumping from that helicopter. It was a good balance. Nonetheless, my mom?s advice regularly came to me about not expecting perfection from him. He is lousy with returning phones calls, exchanging lengthy e-mails, getting together often as our lives got busier, and other things that disappointed me. My choice, as my mother would?ve said, is to not have him as my friend due to these failed expectations and wishes of mine, or to accept him for who he is, not who I wish he were. That is the lesson I?m trying to teach my boys regarding their friends. Will they learn from my failures in this regard and have a lifelong ?best friend? as I still do or will they lose some great friends along the path of life, as I also did? My guess is that they?ll do both--just as I did--and have to learn most of these lessons themselves in spite of my best efforts to save them the pain of going through this process.
Please listen to ?The Bruce Sallan Show - A Dad?s Point-of-View? Thursdays at 11:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m., PST on KZSB AM1290 in Santa Barbara or on the Internet via a live stream. For that link and all information about the show and Bruce, visit his web-site: http://brucesallan.com. Bruce?s column, ?A Dad?s Point-of-View,? is available in over 100 newspapers and web-sites worldwide. Find Bruce on Facebook by joining his ?A Dad?s Point-of-View? page: http://www.facebook.com/aDadsPointOfView. You can also follow Bruce at Twitter: http://twitter.com/BruceSallan.
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